All BAD BOY'S have their secrets
by Stfora-chan
Summary: This is a one shot over the Akatsuki,which are all bad boys, who have their own personnel secrets. But what are their secrets and what punishments can you get from being very, bad boys? A little bit of all the Akatsuki characters so enjoy! Sasori x Deidara, Konan x Pein, and many more lovely couples!


Aye! this is an akatsuki story, so have fun reading it! i use the whole crew and this is the first time doing a fic over our favorite little bad boys! but beware... tobi isn't really a good boy!

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All BAD BOY's have there secrets!-

"Everyone has their secrets, especially the guys from akatsuki. Secrets can be deadly, they cause pain, and they can protect the ones you love the most. But not all secrets are for the better of the person you love, some secrets are meant to hurt them…" that was from the echo in a member of the akatsuki's mind!

It was the same old, same old going on at the akatsuki residents. Everyone was yelling, fighting, and doing the things that would make them be on Santa's naughty list for life, and life is a long time for hidan!

"Why is it that, all the people in this group are gay except me and you?" Konan said to Pein as she leaned into his body, while watching their entire screwed up group fight and try to beat the shit out of each other.

"Hey at least I'm not. Plus it's not that bad watching their love lives and being able to toy with them whenever we feel like it." Pein said as he wrapped his arms around konan protectively.

"Please, there is no way you could be gay! The sex is way too good, or are you really fantasizing about one of them over there. Tell me who it is, is it itatchi? I bet it is!" Konan said playfully as she kissed his cheek.

Pein sighed, "If I was gay then trust me, I would be shoving it up one of their asses. I am the leader, they would obey my every command."

Konan looked up at Peins face and said, "Eh, dramatically serious are we? Maybe you are gay."

Line-

They all had their secrets, like Kisame was a shark man {some call him blue fishy man…} but one of his secrets was that he eats other sharks. {Cannibal!} Itatchi says he hates his brother but really, he wants to screw his face into the nearest brick wall! One as punishment {meaning for brick wall} for all the naughty things sasuke has done and so itatchi can screw his hot baby brother! {Don't let him tell you differently!}

Deidara was a naughty boy too, his secrets was that he plays with sasoris puppets that he leaves behind or when he's gone.3 Sasori on the other hand secretly made a puppet of his little blond gir- I mean boy! So he doesn't get too lonely, because he sure does miss his uke when there separated for too long. {poor sasori…}

Then there is our little Zetsu! He secretly wants Tobi all to himself. Then there is Pein-sama, he doesn't actually need all those piercings, but he wears more because it turns Konan on! Then Konans secret is that she fantasizes about hidan, hitting her with a leather whip that belongs to her kitty outfit!

Kakuzu won't admit it even if you ask, but the other day he did something terrible… he… spent twenty five dollars on a play toy for him and Hidan to use in the bed at night. Hidan hides a plushy teddy bear of kakuzu in his closet, and when no one is around he takes it out and cuddles with it! {so cute right!}

Tobi, the so-called good boy isn't actually a good boy... He stole a cookie, from the cookie jar last night… so Tobi, is a naughty boy.

Now that you know all of the bad boy's secrets, we can get to the story! XD

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"Knock, knock" somebody knocked on the door.

"Ohh my god Tobi, Haven't you ever heard of personnel space?!" Deidara yelled as Tobi attached himself to the chick like man.

"Uhmm, well yeah…" Tobi said in that annoying Tobi voice of his.

"Then get the hell off of my leg, you freggin retard! And answer the door while you're at it!" Deidara swung Tobi off of his leg and into the door.

"Okay! Tobi is a good boy! Tobi will listen to sempie!" Tobi answered the door as he was commanded to, because Tobi… is a good boy!

"Dammit KUZU! I just want a hug so give the shit up already and accept it dammit! Or no fucking sex for you tonight!" Hidan yelled as he tried to pounce Kakuzu.

"Did you just call me… Kuzu?" Kakuzu said as he thought, "I don't care if he wants sex or not tonight, I'm not against rape."

Kisame looked over to his bed time buddy and said, "Itatchi…?"

Itatchi didn't even look over at him before he said, "Touch me and you die." While walking over to the couch.

"Sasoriiiii no Dana! All of this talk about sex is making me horny… un" Deidara whined to his redheaded puppet master.

Sasori quickly and ninjaly slid his hand down Deidara's pants and grabbed him and said, "How about I take care of that for you then."

Deidara slightly jumped as his master started stroking him. "Ahh, D-dana not out here… people will see us un!"

"They won't notice as long as you don't make any noise." Sasori said as he began to slowly stroke faster.

"Dana- ahh, st-stop un… ah!" Deidara whimpered under Sasoris control.

All Sasori did in return is smirk and stroke faster.

"Fuck you kakuzu! I'm with holding sex for tonight!" Hidan yelled as he stormed out the door passing by Tobi making good boy conversation with the pizza delivery man.

"Hidan is too loud." Kakuzu sighed as he walked over to the pizza man to pay him.

"Tobi stop talking to the pizza guy. I'm sure he finds you just as annoying as we do." Kakuzu shoved Tobi out of the way so he could pay the man for the pizzas.

"Ehh, you shouldn't push! Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi said as he walked towards the kitchen.

Itatchi looked towards the door to see what all the commotion was and heard a faint whimper and looked to sasori and his blond uke. He noticed that the blond was making a weird face expression and looked down to sasoris hand and noticed one was busy holding a book and one, well let's just say it definitely wasn't holding a book.

Itatchi looked back up to Deidara's face, and saw sasukes instead. He saw his hot brother who he really wanted to screws face, making that face expression and those noises. That made Itatchi happy in a place down stairs!

You could hear kakuzu scream, "no you piece of shit! You don't get a tip, so go away! And if you see that loud, annoying, jashin worshiping guy on your way back, tell him to come home. Got it!?" as he slammed the door in his face.

You could slightly hear a whimper of the pizza guys voice say, "Y-Yeah, got it."

Tobi walked past the sofa and looked down to see sasori pleasuring Deidara and yelled, "Ohh, sasori and sempie are having fun time on the couch!"

At that moment Hidan walked back in the house, Konan was ordering Kisami to do dishes and Pein was walking through the living room to get some pizza as kakuzu was counting out his change for the third time. Then everyone froze, and looked there way.

Deidara couldn't hold on any more, "Sasori no Dana, ahhhh!" he yelled as he came into sasoris hand.

In Itatchis mind he was seeing sasuke, he got up and walked over to Kisami, he grabbed the collar of Kisames akatsuki outfit and dragged him upstairs saying, "Bedroom now."

Hidan said, "What the fuck is going on in here?"

"Deidara was getting a hand job; now eat your pizza that I paid for." Kakuzu said as he handed Hidan a plate with some pizza on it.

Deidara's face was blood red as he started chasing Tobi around the room yelling, "dammit Tobi! I'm going to kill you with a fucking bang un!"

"Ahhhhh, Sempi please don't hurt me! But if you insist on banging me to my death then I'll accept but I'm not sure how Sasori sempi would feel about that!" Tobi screamed as he was being chased with full intent on killing him.

That just made him madder, "Tobi!" Deidara yelled as he took out some of his clay.

Kakuzu saw what Deidara was about to do, "Don't you even dare to explode this place again!"

But it was too late, the clay went off and Tobi had already jumped out the window. Konan was in the kitchen humming to herself as she finished the dishes. Leader-sama was rubbing his temples as he decided what he was going to do. Kakuzu was marching his way over to Deidara and Hidan was happily eating the pizza while laughing his ass off. And our favorite little Sasori was chuckling to himself as he sat on the undamaged part of the couch.

"Deidara how many times do I have to tell you no explosives in the house! We can't keep paying for this place to be fixed! Money doesn't just fall out of the sky you know, so pay up!" Kakuzu yelled at the blond who was still erked at Tobi, and glancing around the room for Tobi.

"Eh, how is this all my fault! Tobi is the one who started it, he was the one who screamed that, knowing I would get pissed and try to blow his head off!" Deidara yelled back at kakuzu.

"If you have to blow his ass off his body that badly then take it outside and blow it then!" Kakuzu yelled and tossed Deidara threw a window.

You could hear Deidara whimper, "Owww…" in the back ground.

"Aww, Kakuzu sempi, you make it sound so naughty!" Tobi giggled as he crawled through the window back into the house.

Everyone simultaneously said, "Tobi is such an idiot."

"Tobi I am going to kill you. Your death will not be quick and it will not be painless." Kakuzu growled as he glared and started walking closer to him.

Kakuzus arm extended out and grabbed Tobi's neck but before he could do anything Pein-sama stepped in and grabbed his shoulder. "Calm down, I will take care of this. I am the leader after all."

Kakuzu stepped back with his fist clenched and walked up the stairs. Hidan grabbed a couple pieces of pizza and followed him.

"Deidara, Tobi… stay here in the living room and clean up this mess while I decide how I want to punish you. Konan come with me to help me think of the best way to make these two suffer." Pein said as he walked to his room.

In other places…-

"Itatchi, I didn't know you wanted me so badly! Or did the thought of getting a hand job turn you on too much." Kisame snickered as he pulled off Itatchis boxers.

"No." Itatchi took out the lube from the dresser next to his bed.

"Ohh really, because that's not an objection your rising!" Kisame said as he starred at Itatchis little emo friend down stairs that kept getting bigger.

"Shut up and bend over!" Itatchi demanded.

"Okay, okay! Punish me master!" Kisami joked as he got on his hands and knees and spread his legs.

Itatchi stuck two fingers in and stretched. Then put in the third, he swirled around a few times and hit the jack pot, Kisame moaned in pleasure. Itatchi then rubbed the lube on his member and put it all in at once.

"Ahhh, Master please… a bit more gentle!" Kisame moaned.

Itatchi started to thrust faster, he grabbed little Kisame and began to stroke in rhythm with his thrusts. He started going faster, he hit Kisames sweet spot and he spasmed. It went through his whole body and made him tighten around Itatchi, hard.

"Ahh… Kisame you got so tight. N- ah… Sas- Ahhh!" Itatchi came inside Kisame, his warm snow cream filling the shark boy up.

Only moments later Kisame did the same. He came into Itatchis warm hand and murmured Itatchis name into the air. They both collapsed onto the bed and Itatchi let himself fall into Kisames blue arms. He may not let him be seme in the bedroom but he does let him feel loved after words.

Line- Hindan's room!

"Kuzu… do you want some pizza?" hidan asked as he slipped into his bedroom.

"I hate those bastards Tobi and Deidara! They should make some more money around here; all they do is tear this place up and make me pay for it dammit!" Kakuzu cursed.

"Calm down, I'm sure that leader-sama will punish them for this and look on the bright side of it all." Hidan said as he sat on the edge of his bed.

Kakuzu sighed, "What bright side?"

"We have pizza!" Hidan stood up and hugged his frustrated lover.

Kakuzu hit him in the head with a pillow and laid on the bed. "Hidan, give me some of that pizza."

"Okay!" Hidan chirped and obediently gave kakuzu the pizza.

They sat in the room lying with each other as they ate the pizza, when they finished hidan took the plate down stairs.

When he returned he saw Kakuzu sitting on the side of the bed with a confused face expression. Kakuzu calmly said, "Hidan, what the hell is this?"

Hidan looked down and saw the plushy doll of kakuzu in his hands.

"Uhmm, well you see that's a plushy." Hidans voice was slightly shaky.

"I can see that hidan but what is this supposed to be of and why. Also where did you get it?" Kakuzu firmly said.

"Well, uhmm i-it is…" Hidan was now stuttering.

"Cut the crap Hidan, this is a plushy of, of me! What the hell! Why am I a plushy!" Kakuzu was now mad.

"Dammit! You weren't supposed to fucking find that! It is a plushy of you, do you remember that mission we went on about six months ago to hunt down orochimaru and we got separated. I was with his first hand assistant kabuto and you were with that shitty snake guy?" Hidan was trying to explain.

Kakuzu raised an eyebrow, "Yes, explain further on how and why you have it."

"Well, I was fighting him and a needle and thread fell out of his pocket and then we started talking about my love life with you and then he asked if I wanted a plushy of you then I was like fuck yeah! Then he made me one." hidan gulped waiting for Kakuzus response.

"Okay now why do you have it? Kakuzu looked like he wanted to kill the plushy.

Hidan sighed, "I love you a lot and you never really show your affection to me that much except when we have sex and it makes me feel lonely. I do tend to be a jackass but I do have feelings, the only person I care about besides myself is you… and jashin, but when you don't pay much attention to me I get out the plushy of you and snuggle up with it while I sleep. On those nights I lock my door, I also do it on the nights when you're gone off on a mission with someone else."

"..." Kakuzu was silent.

Kakuzu took the plushy and hit hidan in the back of the head with it and said, "I didn't know that you felt like that… no wonder you have been so needy for the past month. Hidan I love you too and I guess you can keep it. But if anyone ever sees it I'm burning it to pieces, you got me?!"

"Yeah! But there is one more thing you should know about it." Hidan said warily.

"What is it?" Kakuzu asked regretting letting hidan keep it.

Hidan picked up the plushy and squeezed its down stairs area. The plushy went, "Ohh hidan, please be gentle with me!"

Kakuzu flinched and said, "Hidan… I'm almost at my limit with you!"

"AWW, but you still love me you jack ass!" hidan said as he rolled on the floor laughing his soon to be kakuzus ass, off.

Back down stairs-

Pein and konan walked back into the room, and stood in front of the couch.

Konan yelled, "Everyone get down here now!"

IN a matter of minutes all the akatsuki boys were down stairs and standing around the couch. Kakuzu was mad again by seeing what the place looked like and all the money it will take to finish it.

Hidan was yelling, "Why the fucks do you want all of us down here?"

"Okay everyone calm your selves. We have decided the punishment for these two idiots here." Konan said happily.

Every one sat quietly, while Deidara and Tobi sweat dropped in their seats on the half trashed couched.

Then leader-sama cut the intense silence and announced, "With care full consideration and the help from Konans brilliant mind, I have decided upon two punishments. One of you will go around for the next month in a dress, high heels, with their hair done and make up. While the other is going to sign up to be a sex slave for the next month and gather as much money as possible to pay for the fixes. Also the one pretending to be a girl is going to be a model and get cash that way to. Now decide amongst your selves who gets what punishment and tell me what you decide, Kakuzu and Itatchi will be the main deciders."

Everyone had their eyes on the two to be punished. Then went over to the deciders then back to the, to be punished again.

Then kakuzu spoke, "Itatchi, Deidara should be the model and Tobi should be the sex slave."

Itatchi nodded his head and said, "I agree. Deidara already looks like a girl and if you add the boobs then he would have the full girl figure. Then there is Tobi, he has the innocent good boy phrase to attract the creepy perverts."

Deidara screamed, "Nooooo! I don't wanna be a girl! Dana help me!"

Sasori chuckled and said, "You made your own grave on this one. But I'll be here when you get home at night and you would look cute in a dress."

"Wait, no Tobi is sorry! Tobi was a good boy but I will admit that I wasn't one… Tobi is sorry! Tobi is really sorry that he stole a cookie from the cookie jar! Please forgive me!" Tobi Begged and cried anime tears.

Hidan laughed and said, "damn the next month is going to be so much fucking fun!"

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authors note-

Hey everyone! How did you like our favorite little bad boys!? This is my first akatsuki fic so i hope you enjoyed it! Review please!


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